Staying on Track is difficult

Hey friends,
I am finding that staying on track in this journey to health and fitness is a challenge.  I am finding that I have to be doubly determined.  Things come along that railroad my attempts.

The past week it has been:-

• Work issues that led to emotional fatigue;
• Long hours at work that high jack my eating;
• Tiredness....so tired I haven't done as much running as I could have.

However.....today is the start of new week, renewed determination that I will continue.

On a positive note, I did a lot of moving from building to building with my job so whilst I only ran once  I did cover a lot of steps so my activity wasn't as low as it felt.

My eating was much better and I did lose 0.7 kgs.  Small but in the right direction.

In reviewing my week it was good to look at what I did well - the small things and what I could do to improve.  If I only improve slightly each week overtime it will result in reaching my goal.

This week I want to run 4x in the week; drink more water and eat cleaner for at least 5 days.  I will let you know how I go.

The other thing my reflection/review has revealed: 

• Help me realise how powerful the mind is and those little voices in my head.
• I didn't achieve everything but I improved - so I will not look of it as a failure!
• Emotional fatigue saps my energy but I have to push through;
• I have to change the mindset from 'too hard' to 'everday it gets easier';
• The more I exercise the less stressed I become.

Have a great week.....I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength....

Love

It is hard to believe that I just wrote the blog below.  Having just drafted this I scrolled through some previous and realise that I was battling the same thing 12 months....hating oneself.....
I ask my friends and readers, who pray, to pray that I will get rid of this self loathing as I recommence this journey.....

I found this excerpt below in a devotion I was reading some time ago and it spoke to me quite profoundly.  Not because I have trouble loving others but more because I struggle to love who I am, who God created me to be....why?.....because I feel uncomfortable in my own skin.  This is not right but it is my reality.  I may come across happy, even confident at times, I try very hard not to let my bad thoughts flow through my day to day life - However if you were to spend a day in my head you would see a very different me.  Ask my family how I am when I have to attend a special event - a birthday party, a wedding....oh dear the stress I go through and put them.  Yes I have been guilty of not attending because I have felt so 'fat', so uncomfortable in my own skin!!

True Love Must Give
Everyone desires to be loved and accepted. But many of us try to find happiness the wrong way. We attempt to find it in getting, but it is found in giving. The love of God is the most wonderful gift we are given. Once it flows to us, it needs to flow from us to others; otherwise, it becomes stagnant. 
Love must give because that's its nature. First John 4:11 highlights how we must give the love we receive: "Beloved, if God loved us so [very much], we also ought to love one another." 

Living in God's true love is a process. First, God loves us, and by faith, we receive His love. We then love ourselves in a balanced way, give love back to God, and learn to love other people. 

Love must follow this course or it is not complete. Once we have God's love in us, we can give it away. We can choose to love others lavishly. We can love them as deeply and unconditionally as God has loved us. 

I have come to realise that GOD LOVES ME NO MATTER WHAT and he loves me so much he sent Jesus to suffer and die for me.  So by not loving myself for who he made me I have telling him he made a mistake it is his fault I am fat.  That is not true....so what am I going to do?   I am going to pick myself up yet again, and try again.  I will learn to love myself, I will do something about my weight and fitness and I will honour God by doing so.

 

I remember recently my dear little boy saying to me "Mum don't you like swimming?",  "Yes I do" I replied, "why don't you go swimming hardly ever?" to which I replied "I don't go swimming because I am fat!", by this stage I am wishing the conversation will just end.  Joel's response "Mum you need to do some running and swimming then if you think you are fat because that helps!!!"  from the mouth of kids.  He then went on to say "I still love you mummy and I don't think you are very fat, I saw a bigger lady and she was swimming!".  Those words "I still love you mummy...." brought tears to my eyes and are another reason why I WILL become fit and healthy.

So in order for me to complete God's command to love others as he has loved us, I must start with myself - its not easy but I am going to try.  In the meantime, I will continue to try and show that love to those around me.  

I can do all things....: I'm Back - Update

I can do all things....: I'm Back - Update: Well.....I am back....feeling like a failure......all those negative things yet again.  Over the past 12 months I have come to realise a cou...

I'm Back - Update

Well.....I am back....feeling like a failure......all those negative things yet again.  Over the past 12 months I have come to realise a couple of things:-

• Goals are fantastic - I can achieve them if they are clearly defined;
• I need longer-term and short-term goals because I loose focus too easily;
• I let "life" derail me from my longer-term goal of feeling fit and healthy;
• I have fantastic family and friends who love me regardless of how I feel about myself;
• Blogging is what I need to do.  It keeps me more focussed and on track;
• I need to put health and fitness as a priority for my family and I;
• God loves me no matter what, even when I fail.

What I did achieve....

• I did run/walk the 10km at Gold Coast in July 2014 within the allotted time!!!
• I have completed my Masters of Management :) 

How have I failed?  Well.. I didn't keep running!!  Instead I got caught up in the busyness of work and study and completely lost the plot on my health and fitness goals.  In fact I went the other extreme.!!!  I put on the weight I lost to get to the Gold Coast 10km.

I ate SO MUCH chocolate in trying to complete my study -  it was absolutely ridiculous.

So, what did I do about it?  I complained, ate more and became more unhappy UNTIL NOW......

What am I going to do now?   Get back up again and restart, refocus and push forward.

My Health & Fitness goals:-

• Health and exercise is a lifestyle I am going to incorporate into our family;
• Run 10km at Gold Coast again .... faster this time!!!
• Continue to run after the run.  In 2016 21km and then...hopefully before I am 50 (I have time up my sleeve) run a Gold Coast Marathon.  
• Encourage our whole family to be healthy and active.
• I will lose 30kg over the next 2 years.

 How will I achieve these goals??

• Being consistent;
• Planning;
• Making time for exercise and menu planning;
• A lot of prayer;
• Small goals along the way;
• Enlisting the support of family and friends;
• Not listening to Satan or discouragers!!!

Even as I type this there is a little inner voice saying 'you've tried many many times and failed'!!!  That is true but I realise this is a lifelong journey for me and I just have to keep on keeping on - stand up, dust off and try again!!!

So stay tuned for my progress......

I get my fitness plan on Monday....I am going to see a dietician next week.  Small steps in the right direction.

I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME:)